Some Fucking People

I'm pissed off today. Surprise, surprise - I know. But really, what the fuck is WRONG with people? Can some people not understand when they are privileged? When they have it better than everyone fucking else?

I complain a lot, but I know my privileges. For example, I have never been singled out due to the color of my skin, nor has my appearance inhibited me from doing the things I want. I am conventionally attractive and when people look at me I am mostly considered a thin person, or a not-that-fat person. I have never been without friends or family, or at least SOMEONE in the world who would take me in if I needed it and care for me. Though I have gone nights without being able to afford a meal, and I have worn the same outfits repeatedly in a single week, I have never lived on the street. I have never worried about dying from an illness, or lost any limbs. I have never been put in a dangerous situation, nor have I been abused.

That's a lot to be thankful for, I think...and I have always considered myself a fortunate person. However, I fucking hate it when people who have all these luxuries and more still manage to complain about their life. I know a woman who does nothing but bitch about having "no money." Apparently her definition of "broke" includes only being able to afford a manicure and pedicure, but no facial that month. To have to choose which credit card bill to pay off, or dig into savings to afford both. To be able to only purchase clothing on sale from JC Penny's. To have to hold off a couple months before buying a new car, or having to buy a used one.

Are we feeling sorry for her yet?

Let's get one thing FUCKING straight. As I have mentioned previously, my life has been more luxurious than probably over 50% of the world's population. But I do consider myself somewhere far worse off than "middle class" America, and therefore feel like I need to educate the majority of Americans as to how big of a crisis the economy is not in. In fact, economy crisis = stingy, over expending douches not being able to afford ONE MORE big screen TV.

SOME PERSPECTIVE:

Not a Crisis: Dammit, I can't fit that new hair cut and style into my budget this month. SO lame.
Genuine Economic Hardship: I can't afford shampoo this month... Shit. And my watered down concoction has finally run out. Oh well, better get the old shampoo bottles for shampoo-suicides of all my friends' stuff so I don't look like a bum at work.
Economic Crisis: Hello, I live in a nation/region/whatever that can't provide running water for its people. WTF is shampoo?

Not a Crisis: I had to buy a Prius in order to afford the rising cost of gas. Sigh...it's so ugly...and you know how hybrids don't have high safety records.
Genuine Economic Hardship: I can only barely afford to keep my 10-year-old piece of shit running so long as I ignore the leaking power-steering fluid, roll my windows down for "air conditioning," and walk on days when buying gas isn't an option.
Economic Crisis: Cars only exist for my nations wealthiest and most important people, and I've never even sat in one before.

Do you guys have any to add?

It Still Feels Like Monday...

I haven't complained about work in a while, and I'm sure that everyone terribly misses my accounts of my droll office job.

I hate it when people at work feel the need to rub in your mistakes. Instead of, "Hey, it looks like this was missed yesterday - keep an eye out, okay?" I get this mind fuck of guilt dumping and shame.

BOSS: Hey, Nicole! Take a look at the delivery schedule for today.

ME: Okay.

BOSS: When did you add that last appointment there?

ME: Um, I think yesterday.

BOSS: Yeah? Well let me explain how the warehouse works.

ME (thinking): As if I don't know - I've been working here longer than you.

BOSS: We prep all the deliveries the day beforehand. So you not calling us when something gets added really puts us behind.

ME: I know. I just missed it. I'm sorry.

Why did we have to go through all that, I wonder? Let me tell you that before making me open the schedule and explain myself, he must have already known I'd added that appointment the day before and known that I simply forgot to call (since I usually do). So does he just get off to this condescending assholery?

I don't know.

Untitled Vegeta & Bulma Fic, Part One

I promised a dear friend of mine a fanfic a long ass time ago...and since I am a lazy bitch, it still isn't done. So I'm just going to post what I have so far and call it "part one." Tee hee!

Part One

Bulma was drunk.

Difficult as it was for her to admit (because Bulma didn’t make a habit of admitting to being anything but perfectly wonderful,) it was a completely undeniable fact that had to be accepted. This was partially because even completely intoxicated her scientific brain could calculate with utmost certainty that a few beers, several shots, and a fair share colorful mixed drinks were too many for her to have ingested and remain sober. But what really made it clear to Bulma was the fact that she was sitting in a bush when moments ago she had been trying to open the back door to her home. She puzzled over what could have happened to cause such a thing for a long time before the answer came to her.

"I’m so drunk!" Bulma declared in what was meant to be a resigned whisper but came out as an undignified bellow. And then she laughed even though being sprawled out in a thorny bush in her favorite party dress was not funny at all. This particular dress cost her a lot of money, though money was hardly an issue for such a high-profile woman as Bulma Briefs.

Or maybe she was crying? Being as drunk as she was it was difficult to tell, but Bulma did have plenty to cry about. Actually just one thing: Yamucha.

Yamucha. It was his fault that she was so fucking drunk in the first place.

You broke up with him, remember?

She did remember, but it was still his fault. If he wasn’t such a two-timing jerk then she wouldn’t have had to dump him and then she wouldn’t have had to go out clubbing by herself to prove to complete strangers that she wasn't heartbroken and then she wouldn’t be so drunk.

And then she wouldn’t be stuck in a bush.

"Fucking asshole…" Bulma muttered to herself miserably.

"I hope you weren’t addressing me." A low voice drifted to Bulma's ears from somewhere outside of her drunken haze. She whipped her head around in search of the speaker, but only found the sort of headache usually associated with fast movements while intoxicated.

"Over here, stupid woman."

It was none other than Vegeta who strolled out of the shadows, bearing a familiar scowl with his arms crossed and feet apart in a trademarked stance. For a mass-murdering, potentially psychopathic alien warrior, he was so plainly predictable that Bulma found herself giggling inanely. This earned her a deepening of the saiya-jin prince’s frown. She supposed it was meant to be a frightening gesture, but she was simply too drunk to be scared of him.

Besides, she had more important things to worry about. Like getting out of that bush she had already forgotten she was still sitting in.

"I don’t see why you’re laughing at your own inability to stand up," Vegeta mused in a voice fully saturated with arrogance. But Bulma was used to that as well. The man practically oozed conceit and seemed to spend every waking moment silently (sometimes vocally) reassuring himself how superior he was to every other living creature in this world, no, universe. It normally irritated the hell out of her, because two people who are too much alike usually do clash. And no matter how self absorbed Bulma may or may not admit to being, at least she wasn't into killing people for her own personal gain.

But right now everything including a haughty saiya-jin prince was impossibly hysterical.

"I’m laughing at you, dummy!"

Inebriated as she was, Bulma didn’t quite catch all the emotions that stirred within Vegeta’s eyes. It was much like sensing something sinister moving just beneath the surface of a black lake, but never being able to identify what or where it was. She definitely recognized annoyance as the champion of his brief internal struggle. If she was sober he may have been angry, but perhaps even an alien understood that it was useless being angry with a drunken, emotionally unstable person.

"And what is so funny?" he asked in a tone that suggested he really couldn’t be bothered by anything she had to say, being a mighty saiya-jin prince and all, but that he would humor her for the time being.

"You! Standing there, all…grr-like…with your face!"

As Bulma broke into another fit of uncontrollable laughter, Vegeta just stared at her as blankly as one of her test-model servant bots in sleep mode. He waited until she was finished laughing and therefore could have her complete attention as he sneered at her and turned to leave.

"Hey! Aren’t you going to help me up? What kinda man are you, anyway?"

Vegeta looked back at her from over his shoulder, his sour expression evidence that he wasn’t accustomed to people telling him what to do. Bulma considered his silence a ‘no’ and began what probably looked like having a seizure in effort to release her body from the bush.

It was slow going. This standing up business was hard work! All she really managed to do was look like an even bigger idiot, but she was determined. So determined that she didn’t notice that Vegeta had moved to her side until he was glowering down at her from an uncommonly close proximity. From this distance, she could see his slightly darker iris amidst the impossible black of his eyes adjusting to the weak light filtering down from a window above them.

"I won’t be able to sleep with all your commotion," Vegeta explained gruffly and then continued to stare at her, another private war raging on in his eyes. It was strange, but Bulma didn't mind having the opportunity to stare back at him unabashedly. Vegeta was always in motion, always moving with a sense of purpose and never lingering too long or too close to others. So this rare moment felt just like being on a wildlife safari and catching glimpse of a sleeping lion. Or something.

Just when Bulma was content with the assumption that Vegeta would keep on staring at her forever, his hand shot out. She was startled to find that his hand completely closed around her arm, as she expected smaller hands from a man of his height. She only had a moment to ponder this; however, and as quickly as he took hold of her he gave an effortless tug and plucked her from the bush.

Despite the inconvenient fact that she had to pester him into helping her up, Bulma still felt that a 'thank you' was in order. Yet by the time her sluggish mind sent the message to her lips, Vegeta was already stalking away into the night.

"Wait!" Bulma cried and hobbled after him, blaming her unsightly gait on her stilettos and not her drunken stupor. "Vegeta! Wait a damn minute, would you?"

Vegeta continued walking as if he hadn't heard her. Bulma recognized the direction he was heading: toward the Gravity Chamber. If she didn't catch up with him quickly he would simply lock her out of her own device and remain there for days.

"Vegeta! Stop! I'm talking to you!" Bulma tried to increase her speed but the world chose at that moment to shift like an Etch-and-Sketch and sent her tumbling onto the grass. She lifted her head to assess her predicament and felt as though she had somehow fallen into the Gravity Chamber and it was turned on max.

Mere moments ago everything had been funny, but now the world felt like it was ending. The picture was dissolving as the Etch-and-Sketch jerked from side to side around her, in her head, in her heart.

Bulma thought Yamucha would be there forever. She once considered herself lucky that she didn't need the Dragonballs after all to wish for a perfect boyfriend. And now she was beginning to wonder if that was a wish anyone could grant, omniscient-dragon-powers or no. Even if it was possible, how could she give herself to anyone when she had already given so much to Yamucha? Where did all of that love go now that Yamucha had thrown it all away? She felt like a jack-o-lantern, completely gutted and only able to smile before all that remained turned rotten and useless.

Bulma forgot about Vegeta, the Gravity Chamber, her expensive dress, and whatever misguided attempt to say thanks she had concocted and groped the ground while she sobbed. She pulled fistfuls of grass and clumps of dirt out of the ground, unsure of what she was looking for or if she was looking for anything at all. Maybe she just wanted to ruin something like she had been ruined.

~*~*~*~

There were few things about the human woman he had reluctantly taken residence with that he understood, but Vegeta understood this. An almost feral scream startled him away from the entrance to the Gravity Chamber and brought his attention back to Bulma, whom he would have been satisfied to leave on the ground to throw her tantrum. He already helped her once after all and he certainly wasn't prepared to follow her around all night keeping her out of trouble.

Then there was that scream. For a moment he mistook it as a battle cry and turned, prepared to teach the woman a painful lesson. But she attacked the ground instead, clawing and ripping away at the landscape that Vegeta had come to learn was well cared for by these humans.

And Vegeta understood. He saw the defeat in the lines of her slouched shoulders. He related to the way she needed something to attack at that moment, for whatever reason she had.

Vegeta felt momentarily relieved that the humans he was now forced to live amongst were capable of such feelings. When he first met Kakarotto he had been horrified that living in a place could be so damaging to a saiya-jin spirit and wondered what sort of awful creatures humans were to have caused such a calamity. As far as he could tell, humans were preoccupied with little else but money and notoriety, but seemed embarrassed with their own selfishness and often disguised it as good will toward their fellow man.

It was that embarrassment that separated humans from other races Vegeta had encountered on his trek throughout the universe. Why deny ones nature? It seemed like humans were merely setting themselves up for failure. And yet the species, from an evolutionary standpoint, was a success. They were clever creatures who had somehow preserved themselves throughout the years, and yet devoted far too much of their time to strange melodramatic pursuits of romance and camaraderie.

Yet before him was Bulma, whom Vegeta had come to expect very little from in the way of good sense (even for a human), burning with the same anger Vegeta had himself been burned by. Aching from a wound that he knew all too well, for which there was no immediate cure.

Well, perhaps he did know a way to help.

Even as he strode toward her, Vegeta willed himself to forget about it and return to his training regimen. But to falter after he reached her side would look foolish, so he committed himself to his budding interest in the human woman.

"Come."

It seemed that she couldn’t hear him from wherever she was lost in her frenzy, but Vegeta waited. Eventually she turned her peculiar colored eyes toward him, assessing him with uncertainty. She had reason to be afraid, Vegeta reasoned, and it was probably this inherent hesitancy that had saved such a weak race from meeting a messy end long ago.

Either she found something in his even stare that she could trust or the excess drink she had consumed continued to prompt brash decisions, for Bulma reached up and clasped his outstretched hand.

I Has a Sad :(

I didn't dress up for Halloween this year...and that bums me out.

I haven't been consistent with my diet, and have probably gained some weight back...and that bums me out.

I am still paying for a costume for the Anime Expo even though I probably won't be able to go...and that bums me out.

It's Monday...and that bums me out.

T_T How are you guys doing?

Forgot a Princess

I can think of no valid reason to exclude Nala from my Disney Princess list. SHAME ON ME.

Nala

Okay, so I lied. Nala is the most awesome Disney princess. She's better than Simba at EVERYTHING without compromising her femininity (say THAT three times fast...), she's the only lionness who had any guts to talk shit about Scar and go on a mission to save everyone, she knocks some sense into Simba without being afraid to offend him, and she was totally going to tear Simba UP before she realized who he was. So full of WIN. The only problem I have with her is that she has blue eyes. I mean, really? She's a lion. I get they were trying to distinguish one lionness from another, but they each had very unique designs WITHOUT changing eye color. And I resent the assumption that blue eyes are superior to brown (even though I have blue eyes, so haha on you guys).

Ahh...

You know what feels really awesome? Working really hard at something and finally getting some recognition for it, when you least expect it.

Just thought I'd mention that. Sorry for my sporadic updates. When I'm not busy I'm, uh...passed out. And usually I get all of my blogging done at work, but I've actually been WORKING at work lately! Imagine that.

Well, I'm sure I'll find something to complain about soon. Until then!

Disney Princesses

Because my life is so insane right now that I don't even want to blog about it, I'll just tackle a completely unrelated subject (although we all know that sooner or later, Disney will own EVERYTHING and no subject will be unrelated to it).

Disney princesses. Let's discuss, shall we?

Snow White

Besides the fact that she's named after her only redeeming attribute, and that her only redeeming attribute happens to be her physical appearance, there's still a lot to hate her for. First of all, she's really not that pretty (in fact, I thought her step mother was prettier)...and since the whole movie hangs on the fact that this girl is supposed to be gorgeous, it's sort of embarrassing to watch. But I'll give Disney a break on this since it was the first animated film and all...also the standard of beauty has greatly changed since it was made. I'm sure that the awful colors of her dress were meant to dazzle an audience ignorant to the wonders of animation. But still, everything about this movie epically fails.

The heart of this movie is a 40+ woman competing with a 16(ish) girl in a self declared "who is the fairest of them all" contest. But the movie never calls out the step mother's pettiness and instead reinforces that this contest is genuinely important...somehow. And that the winner should be allowed her share of royalty and happy endings. So now we have insulted middle-aged women who are made to be ugly in comparison to a 16-year-old by virtue of their age alone. I'm surprised mothers put up with this...but I suspect most parents have to turn their brains "off" in order to watch this shit anyway. The movie also teaches little girls that they should be wary of step mothers (as most fiction tends to do), that they will only get anywhere in life if they are as pretty as Snow White, that a prince will someday save them from house work, that love with a man happens in two seconds providing that both parties are good-looking, and that one should be thrilled to clean up after dirty old men. I'm sure I missed something offensive in there...but I have to move on before I waste all my anger on one princess.

Cinderella

I'll admit, Cinderella is a little more tolerable than Snow White as far as main characters go. While Snow White is a completely retarded waste of (animated) life, Cinderella actually has a little personality. But her "oh, someone save me from this hell" mentality is grating...albeit a completely reasonable mind set for a girl of her age. I don't appreciate that the film reinforces the assumption that if you're ugly you must be a bad person and if you're pretty you must be good, and if you are royalty you are a savior... It also has that fall in love in thirty seconds or less thing that seems to be Disney's MO.

I guess I have no real beef with Cinderella...that's sort of disappointing. I actually really like the evil cat and the step sisters will always have a place in my heart. I feel more for them than I do for Cinderella...I mean, at least Cinderella is pretty. These poor girls HAVE to be bitches in order to get what they want in life, because princes don't fall in love with ugly chicks according to Snow White and her step mom.

(Alice from Alice in Wonderland has been excluded from this list... Though Cinderella is no more a princess than she, Alice seems to be excluded from the other girls and doesn't really fit the standard. In fact, so has Wendy from Peter Pan for similar reasons.)

Aurora

It's amazing how hard this movie ROCKS...aside from it's leading lady. If you can even call her that. Sleeping Beauty seems to be more about the three fairies' struggle against Maleficent than Aurora herself. And the fact that life isn't suddenly sunshine and daisies when Aurora realizes she's a princess? Yeah, that rocks too.

But Aurora herself seems to be more of a plot device than a character. But she is stunningly beautiful in comparison to the other girls up to this point (aside from her disturbingly thin waist) and she is not stupid like Snow White or completely lacking a back bone like Cinderella. She shows promise at the start of the story, with her girlish fantasies about love and cleverness in realizes what her dear aunties are up to in their misguided attempt at a surprise party. But these character nuances are too few before Aurora meets her fate and we find ourselves not really caring about her predicament. Add in that same instant true love thing and we have ourselves a fail. Although at least Aurora seemed to just be smitten with Phillip, and most men fall in love with girls' appearance to start with anyway (yeah, I went there). But then we're supposed to accept the "true love's kiss"? C'mon. It's just as unrealistic here as it was with Snow White.

And then, contrary to Aurora's previous hesitancy at becoming a princess (I'll be nice and assume that she had more reservations than just the fact she wouldn't be able to bone Phillip...) everything does end up okay...because that's what happens when you're royalty. Still, Maleficent is AWESOME, the fairies rock, and the two kings are really, really funny. Disney seems to be improving!

Ariel

This is where things start getting ugly. So most ANYONE would probably agree with me up to this point. I mean, it doesn't take a genius to notice that Snow White is completely vapid and so on, but when you get to this new era of Disney, people generally accept everything that they churn out...The Little Mermaid included.

Oh, Ariel is cute, don't get me wrong. And she actually has a believable reason for becoming so infatuated with her designated prince. And I commend Disney for making her father the sort of "bad guy" instead of pinning it on another step-parent. But Ariel is, alas, dumb as rocks. I mean, how difficult was it to tell that Ursala was TOTALLY setting her up? Did she not expect things to turn out badly? I suppose one could argue that she wanted to be a human so badly she made the deal in spite of these things, but it's difficult to feel sorry with her afterward because of this. And then there's this subliminal "you need to change what you are in order to achieve happiness" message. Why couldn't Ariel learn to love herself, fins and all? Did she really need Eric to be happy? Surely she couldn't find a suitable prince that would have loved her for who she was and not just her pretty singing voice and new pair of legs?

Of course, I'm not giving Eric enough credit here. Not only was he the first "dashing" prince...he seemed to have more personality than his predecessors. And he DID come back for Ariel even after learning about the whole mermaid mishap. But why didn't he try to encourage Ariel to stay with her family? Or at least offer her the suggestion since, you know, she'll never effing see them again thanks to him.

I could be being too harsh on this one...I dunno.

Belle

The major bias starts here! Belle is easily my favorite princess, for all the obvious reasons. She's smart, strong willed, not blonde, nor is she what people would call remarkably beautiful. Yes, I know there's a whole song dedicated to how pretty she is at the start of the film...but look at her. No "snow white" skin, red lips...no blue eyes, blonde hair. She's dressed very plainly in a way that doesn't sensationalize her unrealistic figure... AND she totally hates the douche who falls in love with her for her beauty alone (something every other princess up to this point has put up with). Oh, and she happens to fall in love with someone who looks like a cross between a wolf, lion, and a buffalo before she realizes he's really a prince. And how awesome was it when she got momentarily pissy that this good looking man claimed to be her beast?

Beast rocks in this too, by the way. He sees immediately that Belle is beautiful, but doesn't fall all over himself singing love songs about it. He actually has to learn to love who she is instead of what she looks like...which is really beautiful to watch.

These two DESERVED the happily ever after!

Jasmine

I'm on the fence about Jasmine...probably because I haven't seen Aladdin recently enough to make a decision, but also because on the surface she seems to have everything I would normally like in a character. She doesn't want to marry just anybody, she's snarky and clever, and she's ready to bail on her miserable existence. But mix in her being dressed like a whore and the fact that she is always needing rescue is a bit irritating...though obviously not really her fault.

Actually, this seems to mark the first Disney Princess movie that ISN'T about the princess. Sleeping Beauty thought it was about Aurora, but we all knew better... Aladdin doesn't try to be about Jasmine at all. It's about Aladdin, through and through. And Aladdin is a pretty cool guy. And I like that he is called out for being a superficial douchebag (mostly by Jasmine, which ROCKS!) when he tries to sex it up as Prince Ali.

So, this one is alright too. I guess the princesses are improving with the times...

Pocohontas

Like Aladdin, I haven't actually seen this movie in an eternity...but from what I remember, it was alright. The underlying themes and politics were a little too meaty for a children's story, and I think that's the main reason why Pocohontas isn't as popular of a princess as she should be. That and she isn't quite as "animated." All the other princesses have those huge eyes and willowy figures whereas Pocohontas looks like...a person! Gasp!

So it's hard to trash a true(ish) story, but this rendition of history is very loose anyway. I did like the movie, but I was disappointed with the laziness. I mean, as we have seen, Disney doesn't seem to care how their characters fall in love so long as they do - for most of these girls eye contact was all it took. So why did they find the need to magically make Pocohontas speak English to converse with John Smith? I mean, the ONE time they can totally get away with a couple falling in love without ever speaking to each other and they blow it. Shame on you, Disney. SHAME.

Pocohontas as a character was alright...nothing really memorable. She served her purpose, I guess. Though Colors of the Wind is a brilliant narration for her and probably the strongest part of the whole movie.

(Esmerelda from Hunchback of Notre Dame was cut from this list, because she's just too sexy. Seriously. They even kicked her out of Disneyland for being too hot, and she's certainly not allowed in any of the "princess" collections.)

Megara

I don't know if she really counts as a Disney princess, but I see her included in the merchandise sometimes...so I'll talk about her. I like Meg, I really do, but at the same time she sort of irritates me. It's like Disney realized that girls liked stronger female characters and decided to inject Meg full of so much awesome that it's a little overbearing in this case. She's just...too cool. And in the end, she falls to the same plot devices as Jasmine and all that potential is pretty much wasted. But she does get a kick ass song.

I'm not a real fan of her constant witty dialogue, but it sort of works against Hercules' cluelessness. I liked Meg most when she was being herself (in other words, when Disney couldn't find time to remind the audience again how awesome she is) and this movie happens to have one of my favorite Disney-couples moments. In all of these movies up to this point, the very worst that a couple had to stand trial against was some other evil villain...and I suppose in Hercules, that's no different. But very briefly, Hercules and Meg were turned against each other and the result was quite ugly. Disney movies don't usually get ugly (like I said, I'm excluding Hunchback of Notre Dame which was a WHOLE LOTTA ugly that had NOTHING to do with Quasimodo) and this scene is very refreshing in that respect.

Reading over all that again, I realize that my thoughts on Meg are sort of muddled...but I'm lazy and will leave it at that.

Mulan

This will conclude my ramblings because I'm getting sick of typing and Jane from Tarzan and Kida from Atlantis don't really count (for some reason), so yeah. Mulan! If Belle has a rival for my affection, it's Mulan. This girl kicks ass. I don't even know if I can describe how much. She has such strength to disobey her father in an age where girls just DIDN'T DO THAT in order to save him by doing something completely crazy that most men are afraid to do, and then completely rocking at it? And her side romance was very well done. I don't think much more needs to be said. Perhaps this story didn't have the subtleties of Beauty and the Beast, but it was definitely a WIN.

Okay, I'm done with my pointless musing now. Comments?